Her Mother’s Hope

(SPOILER ALERT)

I read a fair number of books, but I consider very few worthy of multiple readings. I recently found another one in that special category.

Her Mother’s Hope is a wonderful novel telling the story of the complexity of the mother-daughter relationship: the protagonist, Marta’s relationship with her mother and then with her daughter.

Marta’s mother’s hope is that her liebling, Marta, will fly away and chase her dreams. She encourages her daughter in those words, even implicitly releasing her from potential guilt of leaving the family and never returning back to it by saying, “You have my blessing, Marta. I give it to you wholeheartedly and without reservation.” Marta’s mother sends away her daugther in the fear that if she stays back, she will be like her father – discontented, cruel, and selfish.

Marta flies across countries to follow her professional dreams, but cannot get over the tragic life of her timid sister who remains over-protected by her Mama; she vows. “I swear before God, Rosie, if I’m ever fortunate enough to have a daughter, I’ll make sure she’s strong enough to stand up for herself!”

Interestingly, Marta lets go of her very dream for which she fought so hard.

Among her kids is Hildemara, a daughter who is prone to sickness and would end up being, possibly, timid. Marta, in an attempt to ensure that her daugther grows up and becomes independent and fierceless, pushes Hildemara and behaves strictly and harshly with her. She tries to to teach her that if she does not ask, she will not get anything in life.

Hildemara grows up, but ends up distanced from Marta. She never sees the love, because it is never told nor expressed gently. On the other hand, Hildemara, who wants to do anything and everything to pleasse her mother, is repeatedly hurt; she ends up seeing Marta as an unsatisfied, unavailable, inflexible mother who does not love this daugther. Even in the worst of her situation, Hildemara does not ask her for help.

The book is amazingly well written and pours out emotions and captures the extreme complexity of this relationship. It can be entertaining and eye-opening at the same time.

And the book ended with me wanting to eagerly read the sequel.

(Not so?) good names in Bengali

First, a disclaimer: No offence intended or meant to any one or any group.

I have had several close Bengali friends. And yet, it took me a viewing of the movie, The Namesake, to connect “bhaalo naam” (good name) and “daak naam” (nickname). After watching the movie, I discussed with my friend, Rashmi, the concept of “good name.”  Promptly she joked – you’ve heard their daak naam’s! They need a good name 🙂

So, with her help, here is a list of the daak naam’s, nicknames that we have heard of

• Ittu
• Guttu
• Baabloo
• Tuktuk
• Khokon
• Bimbim
• Pinku (Pretty normal, but feels a little odd when you address a 50 year old)
• Koli
• Bulbul
• Jhimli
• Piku
• Bonu

I am sure there are many many more…

We miss the cricket commentary in Hindi

Image via Wikipedia

On the eve of the 2011 Cricket World Cup final, here are some gems that a friend noted while watching the fascinating 175 scored by Virender Sehwag in the very first game of the world cup: India vs Bangladesh. These are all in Hindi (and that is precisely the point of this post!).

1. Sehwag was belligerent hitting the bowlers all over the ground (and outside of it),

Commentator 1 (C1): Sehwag has scored all over the world and under all sorts of conditions
Commentator 2 (C2): जी हाँ! बिलकुल सही फ़रमाया आपने. … शेरों के कोई इलाके नहीं होते.

2. India was 309-2 in 42 overs. Bangladesh bowlers and fielders were looking hapless:

C1: क्या सोच रहे होंगे बांगलादेशी खिलाड़ी इस वक्त?
C2: सोच रहे होंगे की ५० ओवर कब पूरे होंगे!
C1: ५० ओवर तो पूरे हो जायेंगे! पर उस वक्त तक एक विशाल स्कोर भी खड़ा हो जाएगा! वो भी तोह पार करना होगा उन्हें.
C2: लगता नहीं ज्यादा दूर की सोच रहे होंगे इस समय! :- )

3. Sehwag is going hammer and tongs and a new bowler is introduced into the attack. First two deliveries were wide outside the off stump:

C1: सेहवाग इस तरह पिटाई कर रहे हैं की कोई bowler उनके नजदीक गेंद नहीं फेकना चाहता है.
C2:पर वोह भूल रहे है की ये दोबारा डालनी होगी!

Sehwag was just unstoppable! Bowlers were trying everything that they could. One bowler after getting punished severely decided to come around the wicket. He was marking his new run up when Sehwag muttered something. On that:

C1:  क्या कह रहे होंगे सेहवाग इस समय?
C2: शायद उन्होंने कहा. आये कहीं से, जायेगी बाहर ही!!!!

Here is one more that Nikhil Joshi noted while listening to radio commentary:

काफी फासला तय किया गेंद ने. लेकिन batsman ने सिर्फ बाईस गज तय किये!

I guess most of us miss these gems from Hindi commentators on TV and Radio; I know, I do!

We request you to ignore the mail

Every month, for the past 3-4 months now, I have been receiving, in my email, a bill from Reliance Broadband, from the flagship company run by one of the richest persons in the world!

The only problem is that I am not their customer!

I did not get any response when I first asked them to correct this. When I received another bill, I responded in more detail

I am not your customer. I do not even live in India. My email address is abcd@gmail.com As per google’s policy a.bcd@gmail.com is also my address. Any number of dots but the same letters and sequence is going to keep it as my address. For more details, please look at http://mail.google.com/support/bin/answer.py?hl=en&ctx=mail&answer=10313#
I think your customer has inadvertently given you the wrong email address. It is best that you contact him/her and ask for a correction; it would be better for Reliance and him/her. In addition, it would also spare me of these monthly emails.

This time I got a response.. yay!!!

we request you to ignore the mail if you have not subscriber for a Reliance Broadband Connection.

WHAT??? I had never received any such email. No apologies, nothing. Just asking me to ignore the mail! And note: “have not subscribeR”!!

Today, I got a reminder that the payment is overdue! I’ve called their office at Mumbai (+91-22-3033 7777). But I reached an automated system that cannot help me unless I enter the account number. I have sent them another reminder saying…

I received another email from relianceada.com today (included with this email). I want you to remove my name from the list and contact your subscriber by phone/post and let him/her know that his bills are going to the wrong email address.
You cannot send me emails like this and expect that I just ignore them.

Does Reliance Broadband expect that I will keep ignoring such emails? Furthermore, should they not be worried that someone’s bill is going to someone else?

Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption

I tend to use “read” and “listen” to mean the same thing, since I listen to audio books regularly.

The Shawshank Redemption, a dud at the box-office, is one my favorite movies, one that I have seen several times. Recently, I read Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption, which was on my radar for the past decade. The novella and the movie are essentially about Hope. The book starts with “Hope Springs Eternal.”

First: The book confirms (what most people know) that the story is about Red; he is the main protagonist. When I first saw the movie, I was impressed by Andy Dufresne. The second time I saw it, I felt it was about Red. I remember my friend, Vivek, saying immediately, “Of course, it is all about Red.”

Well, you weren’t writing about yourself, I hear someone in the peanut-gallery saying. You were writing about Andy Dufresne. You’re nothing but a minor character in your own story. But you know, that’s just not so. It’s all about me, every damned word of it. Andy was the part of me they could never lock up, the part of me that will rejoice when the gates finally open for me and I walk out in my cheap suit with my twenty dollars of mad-money in my pocket. That part of me will rejoice no matter how old and broken and scared the rest of me is. I guess it’s just that Andy had more of that part than me, and used it better…

Second: The book captures the weight of the  length of time spent in prison  in a much better way through changing wardens and the sergeants, and Presidents of the US.

Third: The thing that stood out the most is that, in the novella, Andy waits for 8 long years after making the hole to escape. In the movie, Andy escapes almost as soon as the hole is ready. In fact, the movie does not capture (movies cannot capture everything) the dilemma that Andy might have had to face before escaping. Stephen King, or Red, explains it.

If he broke into the shaft in 1967, how come he didn’t escape until 1975? …

One possibility is that the crawlspace itself was clogged with crap and he had to clear it out, but that wouldn’t account for all the time. So what was it? I think that maybe Andy got scared. I’ve told you as well as I can how it is to be an institutional man. At first you can’t stand those four walls, then you get so you can abide them, then you get so you accept them…

I think Andy may have been wrestling with that tiger – that institutional syndrome – and also with the bulking fears that all of it might have been for nothing…

So I think – wild guess or not – that Andy just froze in place for a while. After all, you can’t lose if you don’t bet. What did he have to lose, you ask? His library, for one thing. The poison peace of institutional life, for another.

The fact that Andy, probably, froze was the book’s most important revelation.

Gulzar: The Lyricist, Bharadwaj: The Director

I’ve always associated Vishal Bharadwaj with Gulzar, who gave him his first chance and then collaborated with him with great success.

It was interesting to find out that neither wanted to be what they are best known for today:

• Sampooran Singh Gulzar, the amazing lyricist (adapted from Wikipedia): Bandini marked the debut of Gulzar, who was working as an assistant director on the film, as a film lyricist, initially having refused Bimal Roy on the offering saying that he didn’t want to become a lyricist. Gulzar relented only after film’s music director S.D. Burman convinced him so.
• Vishal Bharadwaj, the amazing director (adapted from Wikipedia): Vishal Bhardwaj came to Mumbai to become a music composer, he took to directing movies only to create the opportunity to compose music.

Why do Jeffrey Archer’s soaps impress people?

For a long part of my life – about 10 years – Kane and Abel by Jeffrey Archer was my favorite novel. Then, I read several other books by Jeffrey Archer. He used to, and I believe even now does, have a strong fan following in India; I never understood how that happened.

Recently, I got hooked on to audiobooks. I have listened to books, such as The Millenium Trilogy, Freakonomics, Harry Potters, and The Book Thief. Out of nowhere, I decided to revisit Jeffrey Archer after a long time. I think the last book of his that I read was A Matter of Honour about 5 years back.

Now, I am listening to A Prisoner of Birth.

And I realize I still feel the same way about this author.

He has a unique skill in writing; I feel it is the ability of making a complicated plot very easy to follow. It was amazing how he converts a soap opera – romance, suspense, treachery, family feuds – into a mesmerizing read. You don’t feel like you need to go back and forth. you don’t need to remember anything odd that might have happened in the past. The mystery follows. The story etches itself in the mind of the reader It is almost like the current chapter gives rise to the next one and so on.

The Book Thief

I have had the fortune of reading some good books and these include famous ones, such as LOTR, Harry Potters, the Millenium Trilogy. Those were great stories told in a captivating manner. But, it was the stories that kept me engaged. I continue to be mesmerized by To Kill a Mockingbird for the strong story and the simplicity of the writing!

A couple of months ago, I decided to send a book as a gift to a young girl in India. This time, however, I decided to take a chance, trust my ability to interpret web reviews, and send a book that I have not read previously. Among the many books reviewed on the web, two caught my attention:

1. The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
2. Three Cups of Tea: One Man’s Journey to Change the World…One Child At A Time – Young Reader’s Edition by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin

I sent her “Three Cups of Tea…” and I have not yet read it.

But, recently, I managed to read and listen (audio CD), The Book Thief myself. The fictional story is about a young girl growing in Nazi Germany, meeting many people, and learning a few things about life as she is stealing books to read.

No other book has managed to fascinate me this much in recent memory.

Among many things, this is a thought-provoking book: I think it is about reading; It is about the power of words and the realization of what can be achieved through them.

“”Blood leaked from her nose and licked at her lips. Her eyes had blackened. Cuts had opened up and a series of wounds were rising to the surface of her skin. All from words. From Liesel’s words.”

I was immediately hooked on by the spectacular writing style, an engaging play of words, and the metaphoric poetic language. The formatting is very different – I have never read a book formatted this way. It has one line paragraphs, incorrect (?) sentences –  “The sound of an explosion.”, one page chapters – all designed very carefully and thoughtfully. The cover page with the dominoes is brilliant!

I wished the book never ended.

And it sure makes an enjoyable read if the narrator is Death and he says things such as the following:

• “It kills me sometimes, how people die.”
• On War: “A small but noteworthy note. I’ve seen so many young men over the years who think they’re running at other young men. They are not. They are running at me.”

Live traffic feed at blogs

Unaccustomed Earth is a blog written by a youngster (by my standards!).

Recently, when I visited the blog, I noticed that the Right Hand Column shows the locations of the latest visitors of the blog. I have noticed this at some other blogs too.

While it sounds like a good idea, I find it a bit distracting or, perhaps, obtrusive. It seems like part of my identity is being showcased publicly, at least to and by the owner of the blog. If a visitor is from a  place like Delhi or New York, there could be some solace, since there are many people from these areas that visit that blog. But, I am sure there are not many visiting from “Moline, IL”.

I know that this information can be easily had from the backend of the blogging platform. But, displaying such details (location, last arrived) of each blogger feels, for some reason, odd. It is worse if someone wants to respond to a blog anonymously.

What is more important: the person or our religions?

I am not non-religious; I am anti-religious. I believe that the absence of religion will bring more peace and stability to the world. In any case, religion, as a means to ensure  compliance with “good” has lots its significance, with “legal” rules defining governance, in general.

I have seen several “inter-caste” couples, which is still pretty unacceptable for the majority of India. But, personally, I had not seen couples that have had inter-religious weddings.

But, recently, I got in touch with a  friend, who married someone in a different religion. That is even one step farther than “inter-caste.” It seems they did have their religious differences, which led to arguments. But, at the end, she said, “I thought, what is more important: the person or our religions?” And since then, she feels it has been fine.

But, the above approach is hard, very hard. My friend, herself said that it was very hard. I say it is hard, because, I have seen or heard of  parents breaking off relations with their child due to inter-caste, inter-religion marriages. I have also heard of parents breaking off relations just because their catholic daughter decided to marry a protestant guy! Essentially, religious differences and intolerance can sever even a parent-child relation!

So, in some way, I appreciate the approach this couple took! I foresee a future without religion, but if it is even full of people, who inherently believe that people are more important than religion, it will still be fine.

… I hope.

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